I’m not sure why you would ever want someone to bounce from your website, but sure. Here are a few ways to make that happen. (If you’re doing any of these on accident? Fix it. Fast.)

Have a blurry logo. People will think you are still using Paint on Windows 97, have never heard the word vector in your life, and likely think raster is a predatory dinosaur.

Stream music while they browse your site. (Extra points if it’s an 8-bit song!)  Most likely, it will send your visitor scrambling for the pause button. And then the back button. It’s 2012, folks. If your visitor wanted to listen to music they would have opened iTunes or Pandora or Grooveshark or something. But probably not your homepage.

Use Flash. Your visitor will have to wait for their page to load… Or they won’t be have latest software upgrade… Or they’ll be on their incompatible iPhone… There are so many reasons to use it.

Display a visitor counter on your homepage. Nothing says outdated and unpopular louder louder than a counter.

Write in massive block paragraphs. Or better yet, no paragraphs. That way when people get to your page, they run into an insurmountable wall of alphabet and leave.

Don’t punctuate your sentences. Nothing says “I don’t care” quite like text lingo (even in a text message). So don’t punctuate your sentences. Otherwise people might think you have good attention to detail skills or something.

Now, if you are guilty of any one of these offenses, please know that you’re not alone. Small businesses everywhere struggle with websites that are difficult to navigate and ugly to look at — let alone impossible to find.

If you need a slick website that doesn’t require you to take out another mortgage on your home, we can help.